What is the intersection between avoidance, a lack of agency, and fear across our spaces that generally ascribe to hierarchical leadership?

From Betsy Butterick:

“I think we often mislabel a lack of skill as fear. For example: ‘Many people fear confrontation,’ is more accurately ‘many people lack the skills to confidently and productively engage in confrontation.’

What’s the gap?

Rarely across the sport system is a conflict skill set clearly discussed and valued as an important part of an individuals, team or organization’s skillset.

Typically, coach development is centered on technical or tactical sport specific development. For individuals outside the coaching realm, there is an expectation that the people ‘we’ bring into the Canadian Sport System or physical activity / recreation spaces have some sort of conflict skillset, yet it is rarely defined, evaluated or implemented with clarity.

Why is a lack of skill set a problem?

In the research: Ableism, Avoidance and Hierarchical LeadershIp, we examined research by Brown (2013) and Bilal et. al (YEAR) that demonstrated clear benefits when developing agency, facilitative listening skills and conflict skill sets typically linked to shared leadership practices.

Important to note from this research is the positive impact of shared decision making, and the agency developed within shared leadership that  allows participants to express their conflict experience and authentically engage in the “moving forward” stage of conflict resolution.

Alternatively, what we often see in the sport system is places and spaces where people go silent for fear of unknown repercussions until the conflict escalates to the point where relationships and any attempt at moving forward is permanently inaccessible.

Why do we need it and what happens when we don’t have it?

A conflict skill set clearly fits into an interpersonal skill set that is key for any individual, and especially those who engage down, across and up to navigate spaces that have clear power dynamics and differentials, performance outcomes that feel high stakes and an entire population of individuals that identify as highly passionate and invested.

The current lack of skill set, which is often labeled as a fear or avoidance lends means any conflict immediately enters into a litigious SafeSport space that places a huge toll on all involved, with outcomes that are generally more (emotionally, financially, time) damaging than helpful.

What does developing a conflict skillset look like?

A conflict skillset is typically unique to the norms and culture of the environment the stakeholders are involved in, but it generally involves 3 spaces:

1. Generating reflection and understanding of:

1. Current cultural / political / physical / stress / normative factors that contribute to how conflict arrives in a space (because conflict does not exist in a bubble)
2. Power imbalance / balance and how it shows up on the environment
3. Current conflict and the impacts it has had on the stakeholders

1. Determining desired outcomes

1. Often, stakeholders hold a shared desired outcome and conflict has shown up in how stakeholders try to achieve the outcome

1. Generating context specific conflict language, boundaries, and tools for managing and moving through conflict, including but not limited to:

1. Conflict language and de-escalation skills allow individuals to articulate their conflict, needs and fears to identify new independent or shared outcomes.
2. Acknowledge harm caused and identify strategies for acknowledging, repairing and improving.
3. Build confidence to use a conflict skillset or engage in support moving forward.

Conclusion

The fear narrative can change when stakeholders, organizations and individuals feel they are able to practice a conflict skill set in a non punitive setting. Preserving or improving relationships and changing the impression that the current situation is impenetrable is key. The work is challenging and requires significant and authentic engagement.

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